that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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