I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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