Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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