Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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