yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
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