I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
