dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
