Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
