I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
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