marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
