and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
