i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
