He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
