a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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