Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
