ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
