Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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