My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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