I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
