The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
