I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
