i was rollin on her like bob the builder
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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