4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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