she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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