You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
