U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
