So drunk its hurt
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
