last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
