Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize