Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
