Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
