operation have a gay friend backfired
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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