I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize