Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
