no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I need to calm my uterus...
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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