She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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