You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
