Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
