Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
