Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
