He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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