I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
