so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
