Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize