So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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