Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
