I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
