U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
