Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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