Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
